Pregnancy Loss Therapy in Seattle, WA: What to Look for in a Therapist Who Actually Gets It
TLDR; Takeaway
Pregnancy loss can feel incredibly lonely, especially when the people around you seem ready to move forward. Therapy can help. If you are navigating miscarriage, stillbirth, TFMR, infertility-related grief, or pregnancy after loss in Seattle, you deserve a therapist with specialized perinatal mental health experience who understands how deeply pregnancy loss can affect your body, relationships, identity, future plans, and sense of safety.
Pregnancy loss changes the way you move toward motherhood. You deserve a therapist who gets it.
Finding a Seattle Therapist Who Specializes in Pregnancy Loss Is Important
Finding a therapist after pregnancy loss can feel really challenging. If you’re reading, you’re likely struggling with the invisible grief, incredible sadness, or trauma that comes with loss. It’s tough to admit you are struggling, especially if those around you seem to have moved on or are feeling very positive about the future.
I know these feelings from both personal and professional experience. My own experiences with infertility and recurrent pregnancy loss are part of what led me to specialize in perinatal mental health. Professionally, I have supported many incredible women through some of the most heartbreaking and invisible parts of trying to conceive.
And as a therapist who specializes in pregnancy loss, a truth I hold deeply is this: pregnancy loss is different than any other kind of loss. You should not have to spend your therapy time explaining the nuances of the way this changes every single part of your future experience of becoming a mom. Of the way this endures, sticks with you, and changes you.
Pregnancy loss can include miscarriage, stillbirth, termination for medical reasons, infertility-related grief, pregnancy after loss, or the loss of the future you had already started imagining. It can affect your body, relationships, identity, faith, sense of safety, and trust in what comes next.
When you are looking for a therapist who specializes in pregnancy loss, experience and training matter. You deserve a therapist who gets it.
Questions to Ask When You’re Looking for a Pregnancy Loss Therapist
You should ask questions before choosing a therapist. Your questions are not too much. They are part of figuring out whether this person can support you well.
You might ask:
Do you have experience supporting women after miscarriage, stillbirth, infertility, TFMR, or pregnancy loss?
How do you approach grief that feels invisible, lonely, or hard to talk about?
Can you support me with anxiety about trying again or pregnancy after loss?
How do you support women when their partner, family, or friends grieve differently?
Do you have specialized training in supporting pregnancy loss? What are your credentials?
Is this your speciality? How long have you been doing this?
A skilled pregnancy loss therapist should understand that pregnancy loss is and the complicated feelings that go with it are different for each woman. They should be able to talk about grief, trauma, anxiety, relationships, and reproductive experiences without rushing you, minimizing you, or making you feel like your pain is too much.
Red Flags to Watch for When Choosing a Therapist
From my perspective, the relationship between you and the therapist you select is the most important factor. If that relationship and emotional connection is not there, no amount of skill or training will help you feel well again.
Your therapist needs to be someone you can talk to and someone you can trust.
Red flags are any factor that makes you pause and question whether this person can offer you the support you’re looking for. These red flags might include feeling rushed, dismissed, shamed, or talked over. You may also want to pause if a therapist pushes positivity too quickly, avoids saying words like miscarriage or stillbirth, makes your loss sound small, uses confusing jargon, or seems uncomfortable with grief that is messy, angry, quiet, or ongoing.
It is also okay if someone is kind and qualified, but still not your person.
Trust your gut. Your intuition matters here.
How to Identify and Communicate Your Goals for Therapy After Perinatal Loss
Being able to explain or communicate your goals for therapy is a helpful start. These questions can help you figure out what you’re looking for in a therapist and what you are hoping to process or learn during your therapy sessions.
Why am I looking for support now?
Do I need space to grieve, tools to cope, relationship support, trauma processing, or all of the above?
Are there parts of this loss I feel like I cannot say out loud anywhere else?
What would help me feel less alone in the next few months?
Do I want support around trying again, not trying again, or not knowing what comes next?
If I’ve been to therapy in the past, what helped? What was challenging?
You do not have to have a clear therapy goal before you begin. Sometimes the first goal is simply having one place where you do not have to pretend you are okay.
Common Goals Women Bring to Therapy for Pregnancy Loss or Grief
If pregnancy loss, whether recent or past, is impacting your wellbeing right now, therapy can help. These are some the common goals I hear as a therapist who specializes in pregnancy loss:
To feel less alone after a miscarriage, stillbirth, or pregnancy loss.
To make space for grief when everyone else seems to have moved on.
To feel safe and grounded while navigating a new pregnancy after experiencing loss.
To process medical trauma, birth trauma, or difficult interactions with providers.
To talk openly about anger, guilt, jealousy, numbness, sadness, or fear.
To understand why pregnancy announcements, baby showers, due dates, or holidays feel so hard.
To feel more connected to your body after loss.
To navigate relationship strain when partners or family members grieve differently.
To decide whether you want to try again, pause, or stop trying.
To feel like yourself again while still honoring what happened.
Helpful Resources for Washington Women Facing Loss
Perinatal Support Washington offers perinatal loss resources and a Warm Line for help navigating support options in Washington.
Postpartum Support International offers loss and grief resources, including support groups for pregnancy and infant loss.
Seattle Children’s Journey Grief Support Program serves Washington families, including parents grieving the death of a child from after 20 weeks’ gestation.
Nurturing the Sisterhood: Perinatal Mental Health Therapy for Washington Women is a Bainbridge Island and Seattle-based practice that offers therapy for miscarriage, pregnancy loss, and grief. Founder and therapist Dr. Julie Franks offers a free 20-minute intro call and virtual therapy sessions to women who live anywhere in WA State.
Hi! I’m Dr. Julie and here’s why I write this blog:
Dr. Julie Franks, DSW, LICSW
I’m a maternal mental health therapist for Washington women and the founder of Nurturing the Sisterhood.
I believe that all women who are trying to become moms (or moms again!) need and deserve support, which is why I write this blog—to help create the village every Washington woman deserves. If you’re looking for specialized perinatal mental health support, check out my therapy services and maternal mental health resources to learn how I can help you feel supported as you navigate the hard parts of motherhood.
LEARN MORE ABOUT THERAPY FOR PREGNANCY LOSS →